“Personality begins where comparison leaves off. Be unique. Be memorable. Be confident. Be proud. Be you!” ~Shannon L. Alder Ironically, the moment you stop comparing, you win. Because as long as you think winning in life is about being better or having more than others, your comparisons hold your happiness hostage. Comparing yourself to others is a race you can never win. Which begs the question: How can you get off the treadmill of “negative comparisons” and redirect your attention from beating up on yourself to bettering your future? Here are a few suggestions.
I used to be afraid of going to the movie theaters alone. Not that I was nervous for my physical safety, but I feared that sitting in the theater as a party of one, I would get awkward side-glances (you know the ones) from fellow moviegoers or somehow enjoy the experience less. So I avoided it. At all costs. Until, for the umpteenth time, I had missed a movie I’d really wanted to see because I couldn’t find someone to go with me. I was tired of missing out on opportunities.
My happiness and fulfilment when it comes to blogging relies mostly on two things: how proud I am of the work I’m creating and sharing, and my perspective. When I start to lose perspective and shift into a mindset that isn’t healthy or productive, I can really struggle to maintain my focus along the way.
I met a friend at the airport last month and we got to talking. We had met after some years and while catching up, he mentioned, “You know Aishwarya, I have started focusing more and more on myself as I grow older. Earlier I used to think that it is a selfish thing to do, but now I know that it is only by focusing on my own self that I can focus on the important things of life – my family, my work, and all the things I hold dear!”
The actions you take during your first few months when starting something new have a major impact on your success or failure. Build positive momentum early on and it will propel you through your tenure. Make some early missteps and you could face an uphill battle for the rest of your time. The biggest challenge we face during these periods is staying focused on the right things. You are drinking from the proverbial fire hose while trying to get settled and figure out how to start to have an impact. It’s easy to take on too much or to waste your precious time. So, it helps to have a set of questions to guide you.